Lost in the Tide
by Plastic Emotion
Summary: In the beginning, she had been joyless without hope...and alone. Then...she fell in love...with him...And now...the embodiment of the only life she ever knew faces her everyday, morning, noon, and night. [Part 2 of Double Minded]


**Lost in the Tide**

Summery: _In the beginning, she had been joyless without hope...and alone. Then...she fell in love...with him...And now...the embodiment of the only life she ever knew faces her everyday, morning, noon, and night. _

**Author's Note**: _Whoa, when was the last time I updated anything? Well, this is a one shot that is going to lead to...obviously a new story, but I do want to finish Crashed before I start a new fic of any kind, so look forward to those two. Just a warning, this is after my other fic, Double Minded, so if you just want to read for fun, great, but it'll save confusion if you know the story line._

**&&&**

Quiet...it was very quiet...aside from the three, small plastic fans blowing towards the bed, it was quiet. Aside from the gentle breathing of sleep...it was quiet. Aside from the memories screaming back into the mind...it was...deathly quiet. Her eyes scaled the ceiling, mixed emotions filling her from the crown to the heel, unsure of how to feel anymore. Numbness was effect after all these years. Not a true emotion...not a legitimate concern, but it got her by. She was numb. And that was dangerous. Taking a deep breath, she listened to the three separate fans humming in unison, buzzing the comfort of hot air onto the two lifeforms. One window was cracked open just a bit, an experiment to see if anything worked to possibly make the cramped apartment cooler. One night ice cubes had been placed on the nightstands near the bed, only to be found melted the next morning. Frozen rags had rested among their heads, stiff and desert dry within minutes. The heat was ridiculous in the late months of the school year. April to be exact, but this was more than just dying of heat. It was exhaustion. Nearly thirteen years of exhaustion. And she wasn't sure she could handle it anymore.

Rubbing her glossy cheek, the thin woman slowly rose from the sweat embedded mattress, feeling her form nearly mold against the worn cushion she dormed on every night. It was disgusting...the effect the heat had on her body, yet she had no choice. She couldn't afford air conditioning. Her only hope was that the nights would be cool enough for them to survive. Filling her lungs with steamed oxygen, she carefully lifted herself off the bed, sure not to wake the other, and pulled at her tank top, peeling the material away from her skin just for a moment of relief. Her large gray tinted eyes widened for a moment, capturing the past within the few seconds she had to remember it.

_The kiss finally broke up when her shirt was halfway up her stomach, a gentle tug begging her to part with it. She allowed her arms to pull out of the short sleeves, and he drew it over her head with a smile, his arms wrapping underneath her in a hug, covering her chest in tender kisses._

Closing her eyes, she wrapped her porcelain arms within themselves, trying to rid herself of the abnormal sudden chills that had rode down her spine. It was...hardly rare that these thoughts didn't come to her after sunset when she had most time to think to herself, and silence was most disturbing. Swallowing dryly, her thin fingers brushed a few strands of her thin bangs from her silvery eyes, continuing on her gentle walk from the bedroom to the hallway. She carefully clicked the door closed for a bit more privacy and leaned against the wall in the narrow hall, the walls naked from any pictures or decorations that most families plastered up. Everything was faded navy blue, the effects of darkness in an apartment against any color.

There had been something about this apartment when she first walked through it all those years ago. Those were the beginning years of desperation. A young life...a broken life...and a past to forget. She should have known it would've been impossible. Even now...it was too obvious. There was evidence smacking her right in the face. No matter what she did, or said, or thought, there was nothing that could change the past. Even if the past gave her something that held her together in the roughest times. Releasing a heavy breath, she lifted herself off the wall with the back of her shoulders, scraping her feet against the dusty wooden floor to the next room on the right. Her eyes roamed the ugly dark green tiles leading to the toilet and tub, not at all her choice color, but then again, choice was not an option. Not since then.

Gently she closed the door and pressed the center button inwards, the lock of salvation. In darkness she stood, eyes slowly passing each shadowy form, until reflection caught her off guard. The silver orbs were glowing back at her, but very dully...very dully. Her feet swam her through the cramped room, each lifting at their own time and greeting porcelain, the slight bit of relief anyone could get in that apartment of hellish boiling. For a moment, she felt guilty, knowing the other depended on her, needed her for comfort in this discomfort, but she didn't know that she needed her more. That figure resting on the bed...tucked away into a fantasy of dreams where stress didn't exist and problems could be answered with the bat of an eye. But that's not how _she_ worked. Her mind could not answer those problems...those problems existed in both dream world and real. She was dangerous...for the best.

Yet, how could she keep this secret? How had she not yet gone insane? Lost her mind...hurt someone? Ah, but she had. Two people...maybe three...seven...if more...All because of her existence. If she hadn't lived, maybe he would be happy. They would be happy. Eventually. People come and go, one must move on. She had taught him that. He had believed it. Had he held true? Did she still haunt his mind, body, heart? Was she thought of fondly or pushed away like a cheerful memory gone awry? So many questions...but no one to answer. Gently, the young woman curled her tired arms around her knees, the shower's curtain hiding her figure. She stared at the tiles decorating the walls...each the same...no different than the rest. Was this how she was seen? She was definitely not, it was a statement she could defend, but to whom? Not the sleeping one...no...please, anything but that. She's all she had left. A dose of the cure. But the cure was far. Twelve years far, and now it looked almost impossible. It always looked impossible, but the fear was too latched into her heart to break the nerve. There would be hate, and love cannot deal with hate.

Taking a deep breath, she rested her eyes. Sleep was far from close to creeping up on her, but the past was always a visitor.

"_Awright…now, close yo' eyes._"

"_Close my eyes?_"

"_Uhuh_."

"…_What are you planning?_"

"_Jus' close 'em?_"

"_And how will I walk?_"

"_I'll guide yeh!_"

"_How_?"

"_Jus' follow m' voice._"

"_And why should I trust that?_"

"…_Yeh ask an awful lot o' questions, love…'sides…wot 'ave I done for yeh not teh trust me?_"

"…_.Alright. But, no tricks!_"

"_I promise! Now, eyes closed!_"

Trust...was such a horrible word. She failed at such a thought of it. It was enough to jottle the brain.

"_Awright, we're 'ere…_"

"_Finally_."

"…_Yeh can look now._"

In a flash her eyes were open, halfway expecting his warm, gap-toothed smile, those hollow wholesome windows that expressed every emotion under the sun, ready to wink at her in a moment's notice, that upward nose she loved to tease about so, adoring how he would pout to the words that toyed with his feelings of the only undamaged connection to his face. It had been so real, the daydream...so...full of life. The blush of his skin, the purple of his wounds, the full natural colors of his locks and elsewhere, squeezing her knees close, the young woman released the dark tears that threatened her everyday. For the world, she would wear a mask, but here, in the room of solitude, was where the mask could be removed, and no one could ever see.

"_Oh, 2D…" she whispered barely speechlessly as he wrapped her up close, resting his chin against her raven hair, "Pretty, in'it?" She glanced up, a timid smile agreeing, "I don't even think that's enough of a word to describe it…" The lanky bluehead chuckled, "I came across 'is place a while ago…before I even met you. It wos around sunset tha' I came…but I fink the night scene wos better. Sunsets get me sleepy. An'…wull…I promised myself tha' next time I came back to 'is place, I would bring someone wit me…someone special." he finished quietly, his cheeks slightly lighting up. _

She did not sob, she did not groan...moan...or even sigh. The tears just flowed down her cheeks, rightfully so. Every night was another time slot to reassure the right measure had been taken. If so...why did it feel so wrong? Carefully lifting the side of her tank top, the woman ran her slender fingers across the long an unsightly scar she owned, a permanent and constant reminder that this was result of her actions. She was dangerous.

"_Amee!" he screamed, running to the edge, dropping on fours to check the water for any disturbance. It was still, yet the pit that bore in his stomach wouldn't cease. "AMEE! WHERE ARE YOU?" he cried, pausing as a pair of spooked gray eyes peeked out at him from behind one of the large posts keeping the pier down to the seafloor. "W-Why are you screaming?" she asked with a twitch, suddenly being tackled into a crunched embrace, "Why'd yeh move? Yeh scared the bloody life outta me! Don't do tha'…don't ever do tha'…" he breathed heavily, almost close to tears. _

She needed to move on and take her own advice...she had been telling herself the same thing for years. It did not help, but it couldn't hurt to try. It was for love. She couldn't forget love. Before the accident...after...and so on...it was something embedded in her mind. Love.

"_I lost yeh once…I can't lose yeh again…" he whispered extremely lightly, unaware that Amee heard every word._

She had tried to understand. She couldn't be completely to blame, could she? She was a lost mind...a confused soul...thrown in every way, as a tide to its ocean.

_She sat on the edge of his bed as he researched movie times on the web. He knew she was in no such mood, but she wanted him happy...like before any of this happened. Orbs of abyss slowly steering towards her, the singer arched a brow from his resting chinned position within his palm. Her eyes were filled with nothing but their color, and even that was not its usual sparkle. "Yeh know...we don't 'ave teh see a movie, Amee..." he started, but within seconds her eyes had flickered to his face, an expression of hope beyond reason, "Please, Stu. I know how long you've been waiting to see this one. Zombies and aliens, your favorite." _

"_...I'm sorry." his voice soothed, lifting off his swivel to be beside her, arm curling around her waist. "For what?" she asked numbly, her hands folding in her lap. The singer gently ran a finger along her cheek, preventing her from looking away, "Amee...I know you were plannin' on 'avin' somethin' pleasent teh come 'ome to...I...I'm jus' sorry yo' mum isn't wot yeh planned 'er out teh be..." he sighed, resting his cheek against hers, but he felt no nuzzle in return. In fact, he felt nothing in return. No hug, touch, breath... "That isn't my mother. That was a creature unworthy of the term woman." 2D's shoulders sagged a bit, resting his hand on hers, "Amee...yeh shouldn't talk about yo' mum like-" _

"_She hurt you." _

"_Oh, wot's a few picture frames?" _

"_She set your jacket on fire." _

_Clearing his throat for the moment, the singer glanced away, "I s'pose I'll get a new one at some point." _

"_I ruined them...he waited years...years..." _

"_No! Yeh did wot yeh felt wos right at the time. Yo' father...'e...'e...most definitely loved yeh. I don't believe for one second tha' 'e did 'imself in. Not for one second!" _

_His arms quickly lifted her to his lap, cuddling her in a comforting embrace yet her body as lively as a rag doll. "I want to remember everything...to know what life was like...before you." she logged, twisting the singer's gut deeply, however he nodded gently, "I understand...anyone would..." Pulling her hand from his resting palm, the young girl shook her head, "No...you __**don't**__ understand...I'm different than everyone else...its something...something I can't explain...its the loneliest thing in the world, Stu...stuck alone with only myself as a guide. The people I see...are as real as pictures. The scene may be pretty or ugly...but I don't know what's happening in the moment. I've...been missing something...something I can't understand...and its driving me into a strange solitude. What time does the movie start?" she suddenly questioned, breaking off her depressing monologue. "Eight twenty..." the keyboardist answered wearily, only wondering how she could be so lonely when he was right beside her the whole way._

Resting her head back, the woman ignored the thin wet streams revering down her face, allowing her arms to hang off her knees, knots of silver focusing on the dirty, breaking ceiling, paint hanging in bits. He cared so much for her...about her...her well being. He most likely hated her now. Never wanting to hear her name...see her face...think of the memories. She couldn't blame him...but she was thoughtful. She did leave him something. She did.

_He kept his eyes to the floor, though the glass was fogged up. Their relationship was a strange one, his feelings much more evolved than hers, however she belonged to him, and she knew it. _

Memories. Lots and lots of memories.

_Nervously checking the pile of materials he left along the floor, the singer slowly joined her, eyes focused on her face than elsewhere. Her arms wrapped within his, her cheek resting against his chest, and the smooth droplets warming them both. It seemed like an eternity before either of them released from the comforting embrace, the rest of the world appearing unimportant within those minutes. She lifted her chin, resting her lips against his, calling for attention. He slowly answered, careful at first, but she was knowing, and he pressed against hers as well, the kiss developing slowly, but ending deeply. Eventually pulling away, the singer took a slight breath, their noses_ _rubbing against one another in the close proximity, "W-We're...gunna miss the movie..." he noted, combing her now stringy bangs from her view. Her eyes were luminous...like he had never seen...Pressing him close, she softly smiled, "...Forget the movie..." And they did just that. _

She suddenly realized she hadn't been breathing and sucked in a gulp of air, feeling her limbs grow quite numb. She wanted his warmth...his touch...but knowing that she thought of these things scared her. It was a backwards world. What she wanted, she couldn't have. And sadly, it was the same for the one sleeping on the bed as well. Shaking herself mentally, the raven haired female lifted herself, a bit wobbly at first, but it was only normal in her condition. Pulling back the curtain, she stepped out, time slowing as each foot met back with tile. Shakily, she reached for the cotton papers, dabbing each cheek and cleansing each eye. She couldn't be seen like this, the mask was reattached.

She threw away the tissue, crumpled and filled with emotion, into the waste bin, her hand resting on the knob, her head on the door. Try as she might, she couldn't open it. Not yet. She wasn't ready.

"_Where could she be...__**where**__?" the man cried, arms wrapped over the steering wheel in despair. Everything gone...but the note. A note of remembrance...a note of farewell. His heart raced, his head ached, he wanted...her. The answer wasn't important. At this point, he just wanted her. "Please...give me a clue..." he whimpered, listening to the winds smack against the carpark doors. "Special place!" a small voice answered, startling him from his worry. Glancing over his shoulder, the singer eyed the young child, her hands over her mouth in a guilty manner. She shouldn't have been in the car. She shouldn't have been following him, yet there she was, buckled in, ready to help her friend in need. _

_He pushed the entire idea forward, "Wot did yeh say?" he asked nervously, keys turned and motor running. "Special place...she like it...last place before go! Not sunset...night!" the girl tried, but the singer understood every word of it. Before she could continue, the pedal had been stomped and they were gone. _

If only she could forget...if only...

"_'ere yeh are!" he yelled over the high sped winds, jumping over the door rather than opening it. The child left behind merely held onto her helmet, hoping it wouldn't fly away, her eyes squinting so hard they were nearly invisible. He fought against the weather, stealing her into his arms, his face halfway in her neck, "I found yeh...I found yeh..." he continued on, unable to see the shock in her face or the fear in her eyes. The water smacked below them, bringing him back into the world, "I ain't goin' back witout yeh!" he yelled, whining cracks of wood competing with him. "But Stuart-" _

"_NO! I promised yeh I wouldn't lose you again! I want teh make you 'appy, Amee! Please! Let me do tha'!" _

"_But...I'm...I'm..."_

"_**Amee**__! Do yeh love me?"_

_Her eyes stared at him, trying to ignore the whipping of her hair or the discomfort on his face._

"_Do yeh love me?" _

"_Yes."_

"_'en come 'ome...__**please**__..."_

They were all horrible nightmares...waiting to return each night, more vivid than the last. Her hand squeezed the knob, finally clicking it free. But she wasn't free...not at all.

_Her eyes roamed his sleeping figure, terrified of anything she was able to conjure up. She had no doubt those emails had been true. But he hid them from her. Legal hospital emails...about her...to him. Why would he do such a thing? He knew her past...the real past...Was it from fear? She could understand that. From hope? Could that be cured? From love? He didn't want her to suffer? That sounded right. But then if he should care, so should she. Turning lightly, she caught herself in the mirror, face to face with a nervous lunatic, fleeing for her life. Her chest felt cramped and hollow, her eyes wide as could be. She tore herself from such a sight and carefully leaned over him, her last bid to him. Her lips rested gently against his, a baby's sigh when she released escaping him. "I love you." she whispered, heart breaking at the very words._

Her hands helped her climb back to the room's door, her chest rising and falling with each inhale. She had just about enough for one night. Turning this knob gently, she entered the room, the sound of light fanned buzzing forcing her to remember where she was. She gently pressed the door in place and lightly placed herself at the edge of her side of the bed. Merely sitting, faced away from the other life form, a surge of incomprehensible guilt filling her every night the moment she eyed her. A gentle creature, lovely...loving...timid...cautious...She didn't deserve this. But there were no choices. Not in this lifetime.

_Rolling over, his eyes opened, a sickening twist filling his abdomen. Something was not right. Arms smacking against emptiness, his emotion morphed into fear. Where was she? His dark portals zoomed around, begging for her form to be about, but it was not. Ignoring the chilly weather out that night, he ran into the carpark, his instincts pulling him to the push door. At this time of the morning, he wasn't sure if zombies were still out, but he could care less if he ran into one. He dared them to. It would be the last they ever see. Slamming himself into the locking bar, the blue haired keyboardist gasped for air, his heart punching through his chest with every beat. The windy chill tore through his thin tee and pajama pants, but this couldn't be more than a pinch to him right now. His bare feet gripped onto the dirt and grass, slipping between his toes and at one point forcing his knee to smash against a grave, but he smacked off the pain within seconds, screaming as_ _loudly as he could, "__**AMEE**__! AMEE WHERE ARE YEH!" Running both hands through his cerulean hair, the singer hopped from one foot to the other, spinning all around. There! There was something moving near the gate. Of course, any person would leave through the gate! It was the only exit that led to the main road. Stumbling all the way, the tall man threw all his force against the weather, finally tripping and stubbing his toes against yet another tombstone, but close enough to grab at feet. Swinging his arms around her ankles, the singer whimpered, refusing to look up. Was he not good enough? Could she not trust him? Had he not offered her shelter, friends, financial care,...love? __**Offered**__? He practically birthed her into such a life... "Amee...w-why?" he squeaked, realizing she had two of his suitcases with her. _

_For a second, there was no response. For a second, time stopped...the weather stopped...the world stopped. Trying to lift her feet from his desperate grip, she did her best to keep a stiff upper lip, but she failed miserably, hugging herself with all her might. Swallowing hard, the singer picked himself up, hooking his hands on her arms, "...Why?" _

"_B-Because...B-Because I...n-need to save you..." she shivered, eyes glued to her sneakers, feeling his grip slightly tighten. His face was a twist of confusion and depression, mixed with stress beyond belief, "I...don't understand..." Slowly, the young woman lifted her head, her large eyes filled with rims of tears, "Exactly...all I can say is that you'll be safe if I'm not around. Please trust me, I know what I'm talking about!" she ranted, body shaking with nerves. This is why she didn't want to get caught, but he was catching on quickly. With every one move she made, he was two ahead, and that was saying something. She was dealing with Stuart Tusspot...but then again, it was his heart thinking, not his mind. "I'm safe, Amee! An' yo' safe wit me! Trust __**me**__!" _

"_I did!"_

_The singer's eyes widened in shock as did Amee's when she realized the words that had escaped. "Y-You...__**did**__?" he repeated, largely hurt, "B-But...wot did I do...?" There he was before her, mouth sagging, hair a tousled mess, and the light from his eyes gone out. How could she do this to him? But how could he do that to her? Keep such important information from her? The possible answers she had been waiting and searching for? Pulling away from him, she shook her head, "You knew everything...everything I needed to hear...and you pretended not to know a thing. Why didn't you tell me how I got this scar? Why didn't you tell me how I really ended up in the hospital? Why did you keep my own health records from me! I've been fighting, Stuart! Fighting with myself, and I can't understand why! And I have to find out by accidentally finding information on me about mental dysfunction? Why would you do that?" she whispered, her brows furrows softly, "Why would you...?" _

_Finding himself at fault, the singer sighed, head hanging low, "Yo'...Yo' doctor told me not teh tell...'e...'e said yeh'd be fine...better off, if yeh didn't know...but...but 'e wos wrong...you were too smart for tha'...an'...if yo' bein' bothered...yeh know, up 'ere," he pointed to his own head, "...why didn't yeh tell me? Yo' not crazy." the blue head nodded, rubbing her cheek with the back of his hand, "No...but yeh need 'elp...an' someone teh support yeh too." He reached out with a small smile, but the woman was far too close to turn back now. "I can't..." she squeaked, backing away, "I almost killed you once...I won't allow another opportunity." _

"_Amee!"_

_Ignoring the man's pleas, she grabbed her bags, running the rest of the way. She could hear his feet right behind her, unwilling to give up hope. Well, as the saying goes, if there's a will, there's a way. And he was going to find that way. But it wasn't just a loss of mind or lack of memory that was driving her. It was too much stress. Stress of what was to come. She wouldn't be able to hide it after time passed, he was going to notice. She was terrified. What if she hurt...No. Her instinct would defend it. Medications would most definitely kill. She couldn't bear the thought. No, she had to leave. Start somewhere fresh. Relax a bit from the horrible drama her life rolled out to her. In a flash she stopped walking, two long arms wrapped around her torso. The male had shoved his face into the back of her shoulder, neglected sobs releasing into her hood. Closing her own eyes, the woman bit her lip, her body wanting to shut down in his limbs, but her mind warned her of the dangers._

_Then, it headed for the worst. "Amee..." he sniffed, refusing to release her, "MARRY ME!" She stared off, horribly startled and overjoyed at the same time. Her voice had left her throat, her arms and legs receiving jolts of twitches the closer he got. Resting his chin against her shoulder, the singer closed his eyes, pressing his lips to her neck. "Please...Amee..." he sighed, the tingle making her shiver even more. There was nothing more she could do. She felt all restraints on her, yet freedom at the same time. Fear...but love. Danger...and safety. "I love yeh...an'...an' I dunno wot I'd do witout yeh. Yo' my cure, love. Witout yeh I'm a mess...p-please...let me be yo's." he nuzzled, feeling her pressing back into his chest, just slightly. She did not react when he slowly, but cunningly, unhooked her fingers from the suitcase handles and moved them away from her. _

_Her chest heaved as she hung her head with his, the pains in her stomach making her nauseous, the focus of her mind split in thirds, the past, present, and future. Did her future lie alone...or with him? He who cared, but was in grave danger? Slowly he rested his hand on her belly, and her eyes widened nervously, forcing her to glance to the side, but all she received was a soft smile before it suddenly vanished. The thudding of her heart nearly stopped, paralyzed with dread, but it was something else that had wiped the smile, not she. Furrowing her brows in curious wonder, the raven haired woman turned her neck, facing in the same direction the singer had snapped to. Before she could ask, deep groans had voiced themselves, announcing their arrival. The male's grip had suddenly released, but his fingers clung onto her wrist, pulling her in jerks, "Amee! We gotta get out o' 'ere!" _

_As a zombie herself, she was unable to move, her mind unsynchronized with the movement of her body, "S-Stu-!" Without a second thought, the tall halfwit scooped her up as if she were made of feathers and ran opposite of the painfully starving moans, the bottoms of his feet growing weary and bruised. Refusing to put her down, he stopped for a moment to catch his breath and check around him. The night was still, but...unnatural silence. "We...need...teh...get inside..." he grunted, swallowing for his dry throat. Oblivious to the fact that being eaten was a possibility in this land, Amee_ _entertained herself with the curls along his neck, pressing along them with her fingers and combing through them gently. What could she do? She was given a choice. And though she loved the choice with all her being, she knew she couldn't take it. She could feel the fresh new tears running down her cheeks, blinding her vision with each step the man took, but this was out of her hands. If she loved him...she would have to let him go..._

_Before she knew it, they had somehow snuggled back into bed, the singer's arms caged around her, more likely as a restraint than protection. They remained in that position until the winds died down and 2D felt Amee relax in his grip, combing her bangs from her eyes. Those shimmering, fantastical eyes. He said nothing while he pressed his weight against her to reach over to the nightstand on her side, opening the drawer and pulling something out. It was a crumpled tissue, but he handled it with care, closing the drawer and laying back. Flashes zoomed within Amee's mind, too many things to handle. It was a wonder why her head hadn't exploded. Unraveling the thin paper, the singer cursed as he fumbled with its contents, dropping one in the sheets. Leaning up, he squinted before finally locating it near Amee's elbow. "I...I know yeh fink it wos prolly on impulse..." he sighed, staring at the end of the bed, "But...it wosn't. I've been finkin' for a long time, love. It ain't somethin' I can jus' decide ova' night, yeh know. I...I jus' wosn't on plannin' teh ask 'is way...It wos s'pposed teh sound...nice...an' prepared...Yeh...yeh bring out the worst in me, Amee...but I'd rather 'ave no other doin' tha'. I know I ain't the smartest...but I'd be a fool if I didn' do anythin' for you." he whispered, shakily sliding a thin band of gold to her finger, a triple set of diamonds bunched together in the center on top. _

"_Yeh don't gotta answer now...jus' fink about it. Please. We'll talk tomorrow, love. I love yeh." he bid as he nuzzled, pressing his lips to her cheek, then closing his eyes slowly, arms curled around her giving her one last good night squeeze before he tried his best to drift off to a world that didn't hold worries. What he didn't realize was she was always going to have the will power to do as she felt best, as the next morning he found no trace of her except for a small note twisted within his fingers. A note that he would keep with him always. It was supposed to be only a little while. But years had passed, and one would think hope would run thin..._

In her hand, the object glistened, though no light touched it. It had its own shimmer, as if it contained a life within. Almost a sign of hope...

For a very long time, she gazed at it as she did every night, blessing it with a gentle kiss before squeezing it within her palm. Behind her, life stirred, but only for a moment before a weary sigh escaped. Her heart had nearly leaped in that moment, almost caught in action. Quickly, she shifted some books within her drawer and placed the object underneath a clean cloth, her secret hiding space during these years. Carefully she shut the drawer and rested her forehead against it, but only for a second before resting back on the bed. Everything was how it should be. Detached, alone, and quiet. Secrets were meant to be kept hidden, as well as unspoken, but her girl was too curious. Finally turning on her side, the pale, black haired woman rested her hand on the child's face, brushing aside a deep cerulean strand, admiring what nature could conjure. She was all she had from this lonely world. Her...and the dark memories she released every living moment.

There wasn't any doubt that this girl had brought hope and happiness to her, but little did she know that every time she smiled, or blinked, or sighed, his reflection would shadow her, forever etching the past to her blood. The unbearable heat entirely forgotten, Amee Rose hid her cheek within her pillow and closed her eyes. Sleep had always been her freedom, for her nightmares came while conscious, and eventually, the only thing that appeared to live were the fans.


End file.
